EU individual paragraph

Intro

One topic in last week‘s class was the difference between the different institutions of the EU or the European institutions. There were some examples given, like the European Commission or the European Parliament. I did some research on the different institutions and it took out three of them to write in my paragraph:

Paragraph brainstorming

• three European Institutions
• The Council of Europe
• not an EU institution --> international
• 47 member states
• human rights, democratic development, ...
• The Council of the European Union
• short name: "Council"
• passes on laws
• "decision-maker" --> for EU citizens
• works with the European Parliament
• The European Council
• heads of state/government of EU member states
• sensitive issues --> influence on politics within the EU
• cannot pass on laws
• easy to get confused with the names
• What to do?
• do research
• look up differences and make notes
• What are the main differences/functions of each body?
• clearly structure the paragraph to understand the differences

Original paragraph

The EU consists of institutions and bodies which are all responsible for certain aims. Some of these institutions are difficult to distinguish from each. A good example for this would be The Council of Europe, The Council of the European Union and The European Council. The last one named, is made up of the heads of state or government of the EU member states and deals with complex or sensitive issues. This means it has an influence on the general political agenda of the EU. However, the European Council has no powers to pass on laws. That is what the Council of the EU, which is often only called by its short name „Council“, does (together with the European Parliament). Therefor it is an indispensable decision-maker, acting for the lives of the EU citizens. Not only for the 500 million EU citizens, but for some 800 million citizens acts the Council of Europe, which is an entirely separate body from the European Union. It is an international organization with 47 member states and it deals with important subjects, such as human rights and democratic development.

[186 words]

Feedback summary 1

My colleagues told me that I should take some attention to the spelling of the word "therefore" as I tend to forget the "e" at the end. This is one of my very common mistakes... My concluding sentence does not conclude the paragraph, it can rather be seen as the last sentence of one sub-point. They also told me that the paragraph was too complicated to read and they thought that mentioning the "500 million EU citizens" was an irrelevant information.

Revised paragraph

The EU consists of institutions and bodies which are all responsible for certain aims. Some of these institutions are difficult to distinguish from each. A good example for this would be The Council of Europe, The Council of the European Union and The European Council. The last one named, is made up of the heads of state or government of the EU member states and deals with complex or sensitive issues. This means it has an influence on the general political agenda of the EU. However, the European Council has no powers to pass on laws. That is what the Council of the EU, which is often only called by its short name in short „Council“, does (together with the European Parliament). Therefore it is an indispensable decision-maker, acting for the lives of the EU citizens. Not only for the 500 million EU citizens, but f For some 800 million citizens acts the Council of Europe, which is an entirely separate body from the European Union. It is an international organization with 47 member states and it deals with important subjects, such as human rights and democratic development. Keeping in mind all those main differences makes it easier to differentiate these three important bodies. 

[181 words]

Feedback summary 2

"The word aims is not correct in this context."
"Topic sentence und concluding sentence are good."
"Why didn’t  you describe the Council of the European Union?" --> I actually did, but I wrote The Council of the EU meaning the same thing.
"Linking words are right in place."
"It’s a difficult paragraph cause you’ve chosen the three bodies that sound similar and that fuckin confuses people."

Final paragraph

The EU consists of institutions and bodies which all have several areas of responsibility. Some of these institutions are difficult to distinguish from each. A good example for this would be The Council of Europe, The Council of the European Union and The European Council. The last one named, is made up of the heads of state or government of the EU member states and deals with complex or sensitive issues. This means it has an influence on the general political agenda of the EU. However, the European Council has no powers to pass on laws. That is what the Council of the EU, in short „Council“, does. Therefore it is an indispensable decision-maker, acting for the lives of the EU citizens. For some 800 million citizens acts the Council of Europe, which is an entirely separate body from the European Union. It is an international organization with 47 member states and it deals with important subjects, such as human rights and democratic development. Keeping in mind all those main differences makes it easier to differentiate these three important bodies. 

[181 words]